I am still processing everything that went on this weekend (seriously, it was doozy. This coming weekend with 2 birthday parties pales in comparison!), but one of the BEST parts of Saturday’s sessions was when we broke out into small groups and discussed “blog stuff.”
Jackie led our discussion and did a damn fine job! Along with Julie, our group consisted of Cicely from Flying Unicorn Cat and Norka from The Norka. I’m actually not sure how long we talked, but we discussed some interesting topics including pageviews, commenting, comments, blog types (go WordPress!), increasing readership, going viral, and how blogging affects us. I’ve only been blogging for 6-7 months, so at first I really wasn’t sure what I could add to the discussion – but it turns out I couldn’t shut up! Sorry ladies.
I feel like I have really grown as a “blogger” these past few months and while I don’t always know what I’m doing, “Fake it till you make it.” is a really good motto. Here’s the truth though…sometimes blogging makes me terribly insecure and it also makes me secretly competitive and frustrated.
I love blogging. I love writing and rambling. I love meeting new people (in real life and online). I do it FOR ME, but it’s hard to separate those insecurities at times. It feels like I’m flashing back to being the LEAST cool kid at school (and I was a pretty big nerd). I know I have poured my heart out into a post or comment or take a lot of time to write something up…and I get crickets. No feedback, little readers, etc.
And it makes me want to scream — what is NOT GOOD ENOUGH about me? There are blogs I read with a gazillion loyal readers and a huge following and I think their blog kinda sucks (not naming name). I don’t get it. I think to myself — what’s their secret? Why I can’t I be like them? WHYYYYY? They must be doing something right — and I must be doing something wrong!
Now, I’m not trying to whine and complain here. I don’t want pity comments or readers. No. What I’m really trying to say — what I learned this weekend is that it’s normal. And EVERYONE (who blogs – I can’t say non-bloggers care about comments/pageviews) feels this way. EVERYONE.
And you know what? It’s NOT a bad thing. It just means I have room for improvement. The opportunity to grow. To
A very clear message that I got from the conference this weekend was that YOU CANNOT COMPARE. Blogging – like life in general – is subjective. There’s no RIGHT way, there’s no perfect post or moment that is going to going to make everyone happy. I’m not blogging for world peace or to end poverty here people. Or even to win awards or make money.
My blog is for me. To document my family. My friends. My running. My life. A tool to connect with others.
Thank you to those who do read and keep coming back– even if you don’t comment. It makes me want to write more and be a better blogger. And maybe come up with a solution for world peace, because really…
Do you ever have blog envy? How do you think I can improve on my blog skillz? (preparing myself for harsh/critical comments…)
My take on your blogging is a way to communicate your life. You communicate your feelings and thoughts and it helps you process your busy busy life. I truly envy you to be able to write like this online. I have tried keeping a journal.. and I was pretty successful for a short period.. then I’d lose interest. You have so much going on.. between the babies and work and running and then “the family” and then some other stuff. I can’t remember ever multi tasking like that. 3 kids growing up and help with a business..Turnpike Wine/Liquors and Alpha Shuttle..those were pretty hetic times.. but to write a blog or jounal.. never entered my mind. I have to say Im pretty proud of you to be able to write so descriptively. Keep up doing what your are doing..you have a wonderful way with words and its fun reading about what you are experiencing.. Love you so much!!
I SHOULD have added — that my mom is the BIGGEST supporter and reader (along with Dan), so thank you! I remember your journals and there is no doubt that I get this from you!
And you know — blogging is not just for the young. There were women your age at my blogging conference this weekend. It’s never too late to start!! (You would probably love craft/baking blogs!)
I can totally relate to this post. I get insecure sometimes too. I think of blogging as a way to push myself past those insecurities and put myself out there in a way that I am more comfortable with than something like public speaking (scary!). So far I have gotten pretty good feedback, which is really motivating me to continue.
I also want to say that I really love your blog. I love your writing style, and I love how candid and funny you are. I also love the balance you keep between family, work, fun, and your own personal goals and interests. I can only hope to find that kind of balance when I have kids someday.
Heather recently posted..Weekend Update: Red Sox Edition
Yes exactly! I have always been socially awkward (I’m REALLY good at faking it now), so blogging is kind of a good compromise for getting out of my shell!
Thank you SO much for your kind words!! You will find that balance, by the way. And also, we need to officially meet up at some point because HELLO we live like 5 miles from each other!! We need to do an East Side Bistro night (have you been there?) or something.
And PS – Go Sox
I love this post, especially because I have thought the exact same things! I’ve only been blogging for a few months, so I’m still getting my sea legs, but sometimes I think that if I wrote about certain things, I’d get more readers, but then I think that’s absurd. Although I like to write about staying healthy, I think what differentiates me from “health” bloggers is that I love doing my restaurant reviews and posts about Orlando. Those are for me and to share my passion, even if they’re not as “popular.”
Jessica @ Sushi and Sit-Ups recently posted..Memories of India
I happen to LOVE reading about my city and the great restaurants we have here!! Especially since most of the time we don’t have a chance to eat out (kids will do it!). Just keep up the great work and more and more people will visit. That’s the awesome thing about blogging — in the end quality IS better than quantity!
I did a post that people went CRAZY over…and it was just me speaking (blogging) from the heart. I came very, very close to closing comments, because the lack of them on posts that I thought were really good was driving me bonkers. It really messed with my self esteem.
But after the outcry, I realized that while I can’t measure my success in comments or shares, I do need to allow people to have space to connect with me in that way…so I’ve kept my comments open.
I definitely understand the tendency to compare your work to others, and all I can say is that as long as you keep reminding yourself that you are the BEST you that anyone can be, you’re fine.
Katy Widrick recently posted..Reachers vs. Settlers
You’ve got ALL of that right
I’m glad you’ve kept your comments open, btw! I love the discussion that your posts generate 
Great post! It’s funny to even consider comparing myself to someone who blogs/writes fulltime as their job, and wonder why they are where they are.
Oh, wait, this is their entire life! It suddenly makes sense. Yet, it still doesn’t stop me from occasionally being like , “He/She’s not even a good writer.” But really, at the end of the day, if writing makes you (or me) happy, that’s the best part of it all, right?
Jordan @ food, sweat, and beers recently posted..Catching my Unicorn
YES – I don’t why I think I can pale in comparison either. My life is kinda full (sometimes TOO full at times!). Yet, my brain (and self-esteem) still goes there.
It really is about what makes you happy — everything else is just a perk!
Hey Michelle! I have to say I loved this post because I feel the same way a lot. I try to put out strong content and I’ll write a post I think is awesome and get almost no comments!
It’s hard not to compare, but I try my hardest not too. I love blogging, it’s fun, it makes me happy and I know my small circle of friends enjoys reading what I ramble about.
Jess recently posted..Hiking the Billy Goat Trail
YES!!! I agree. It makes me happy that my friends don’t think I’m crazy and in fact say nice things about my blog!! I think you are a GREAT writer and while I don’t always comment (sometimes I can’t for some reason
) I do read along. I’m really so glad Katy introduced me to you!
I’m another loyal reader of your blog and really look forward to the posts.
I feel you on the insecurities too. I did some blogging back before C was born and shortly after, but with little to no comments, I stopped, and now I regret it, because I don’t post pictures of C and I feel like I’ve lost a huge gap of time in her life that I didn’t journal. I want to start again (maybe you will help this novice restart?!) and catalog both kids as well as my goals to become healthier.
You do a wonderful job and though I don’t always post, I do always read and enjoy your commentary.
Kaycee
Thank you Kaycee!! I hear ya – I wish I had started blogging sooner!!
I will definitely help you out on the blogging front — first things first – WordPress not Blogger. More on that soon
First of all, way to steal the words out of my mouth again! I was also going to apologize for talking too much during the breakout session — I always feel like I talk too much and drive people crazy. Which, honestly, is one of the reasons I started blogging in the first place. I felt like I was boring the people in my real life. So why not harass strangers instead with my ramblings? Oh well, at least it’s on their own time!
But I’m with you. It’s so hard to not get caught up in the game of blogging — who has more Twitter followers, who’s getting the most comments, most paid opportunities, etc. But then I remind myself once again that a) this is for me and helps me remember things I never want to forget about my daughter’s childhood b) I have a full time job that I LOVE and c) blogging is a lot cheaper than therapy.
Keep up the great work! If everyone else stops reading (which would never happen in 1,000 years btw), I’ll still be here!
Jackie @ MomJovi recently posted..Red Light, Green Light, Don’t Get Hit
YES times a thousand.
And one of my worst habits is talking over people (I should do a confession thread on THAT). I just can’t stop myself. I do listen though
I’m in the same boat as you…I’ve been getting more traffic lately but I definitely get lots of blogger envy. I’d give you the same advice I’m giving myself – keep writing, stay confident and market yourself. Thanks for a good post!
Thank you — and YES to all of this
I feel ya! I get so bummed sometimes because no one comments on something or I don’t get many views… and then I have to think to myself… “Really? You’re concerned about your web presence?”
And just so you know, I love your blog…. birthday twin.
Tara @ texasrunnergirl.com recently posted..12 mile long run
Exactly! It seems silly, yet I still stress about it.
I love your blog too — and read it every day, even if I don’t always comment! (and sometimes I THINK I comment, but later realize I didn’t. Ha. What you can’t read my thoughts??)
I think every blogger feels like this from time to time, but it is about you! I really enjoy reading your blog, even though I don’t always comment, I’m still reading
Christina recently posted..Another weekend…and confession…
Thank you — same goes for you!
I love your blog and this post specifically! I do not have a blog of my own (I started one but can’t seem to write anything) because I have the same fears and insecurities. And I haven’t even written anything! Thank you for reminding us we are only human and feeling this way is ok. Maybe I’ll go write my first post now.
You should!! I would read it
Yeah, we have the same feelings! We really don’t get as many views as we would like, and we have certain blogs that we don’t understand why they are so popular… because they are written by people who aren’t all that funny. However, I don’t get as bothered by it as Hub because my reason for blogging is to keep track of what is going on in my life. I don’t scrapbook or write in a journal, but I love to write and so I feel like the blog takes the place of a baby book for us. And I think there are ways to get more traffic to your site, but they take a lot of work and right now I have enough on my plate!
About the conference – because DC is so overridden with bloggers I think it makes it a lot harder to “break in.” Maybe I will try. Maybe AFTER the dissertation is done. I do have to say, I have a lot of friends with blogs and I read them – or at least peek at them – because they are my friends. With your blog, I really do love reading it. You’re a great writer, funny, and honest and I think you’re going to be big.
Nicole C. recently posted..How To Make Frozen Pizza Pretty Awesome
Yes – you have a lot going on right now! I considered starting a blog when Braeden was born (actually, I did have a family one) but never followed through. I WISH I did. I have a TON of pictures of him, but I really don’t have any baby books or scrap books.
Thanks for the very kind words! I don’t know about being big (I’m OK with saying smaller!), but I do hope to build up my “network” of peeps. I feel lucky that there are such awesome bloggers and the like here in Orlando (who would have ever guessed??) — so many brains to pick. And I know I don’t comment on YOUR blog every day — but I am your biggest fan and I read every post. Well, maybe not the pig ones. Ha ha.
What a great post Michelle! You’re absolutely right, everyone feels this way at one point or another. I think the ultimate thing to keep in mind, like you said, is that you do this for you. The readers, comments, followers, paid opportunities are nice but that’s not what it’s about (at least for me), those are just nice perks.
Carolina @ Peas in a Blog recently posted..Devils Food Cake.
Thank you and yes — everything else is just a nice perk… especially the people I’ve gotten to meet – including you!!
I love your blog Michelle. I find yours to be one of the most true and realistic that I read. You eat real food, have real human problems and I can relate to you. You’re sorta my blogger-idol.
This post is great! It’s come at a time when I’ve been sadly moping about my own blog and it’s lack of comments/pageviews. I was driving into work today thinking about how I can’t compare myself to many of the other bloggers because we’re not the same people and I certainly don’t have nearly the same amount of time to commit to garnering readers and views. My blog is about me and being truthful to me, for better or worse, boring or interesting. The people closest to me read it and comment to me in person about it, so I guess that will have to be enough for me.
Sarah @ Run Sqrl, Run recently posted..Om Nom!
Aww thank you! I think you made my day
Definitely don’t feel sad or upset. Just keep writing about things YOU want to write about. People will come and they will have a lot of fun and wonderful things to catch up on!
yay i love this. we are on the same wave length. i guess. we will get there. i don’t think it is us. there is just sooo much out there. it is so hard for everyone to keep up. you find your followers and along the way hopefulyl more to come!
Stephanie recently posted..Matchmaker, Matchmaker
Yes yes yes – agreed (can you tell?). There are SO MANY bloggers out there now. I honestly wish I could read and meet every single of one of them too. I find the whole blogging thing fascinating!!
I found your blog about a month ago and love it! I don’t think you need to change a thing, it is awesome just the way it is!
Awww thank you!! And thanks for reading along
I’m so glad Katy tweeted about this post because I love it. I’ve only been blogging for about 2 months, but I also find it a mystery how some people have thousands of followers and they aren’t saying anything interesting. I don’t have many comments or page-views myself, but then again I have a full-time job outside of blogging so I can’t dedicate hours to networking & twitter & social media like some of the other bloggers, so I just do my best & write about what I like. I’ll definitely be coming back to read more from you though (so hooray for page-view increases!) ha
Jessica @ For the Fun of Fit recently posted..Athena
It’s a nice feeling knowing you aren’t alone right?
I also work full time and don’t get to my blog during work (which is why I’m commenting now!). It’s really about doing what makes YOU happy. Sometimes I just need a gentle reminder
I wanna go to one of these! And girl, I love your blog. Your real. Your funny. Your personable. Keep it up. And if someone doesn’t like you…screw em’!
Angie recently posted..The Hummus Master
I want to go to one too – I know you would have a blast. It’s so fun to hang around peeps who like to do the same things as you do!!
Thanks for the compliments
I always appreciate your comments – for realz (and I love your blog too — for the same reasons!).
I read this post earlier today but am only just getting around to commenting now (my dumb work blocks your blog – so rude!!!)
Anyway, I love love love what you wrote. And like so many other bloggers, I can totally relate. Sometimes I work so hard on a post only to get no reaction – and other times lots of people respond to something that I never would’ve expected. It’s easy to get down when you don’t get a lot of feedback or make the connections you were hoping for. But i just have to keep reminding myself that ultimately this blogging thing is a HOBBY. And one that I enjoy very much. So no matter what, the most important thing is that it’s fun and that I continue to enjoy it.
And it is sort of nice to know others are in the same boat. I sometimes forget that. But then I think about all the awesome blogs I read during the day that I forget to go back and comment on later (I try to read when I have free time at work through a reader but my employer blocks a lot of the actual sites) and I think others may be doing the same. I also think about all the great connections I’ve made from blogging and at the very least, I’ll always have that.
I know this is a long comment, but basically I want to say that I appreciate this post, am thankful that you put this out there, and that I think your blog is great (so keep it up!)
Lauren recently posted..The Real Reason I’m Not a Morning Runner
I had the same problem at my last job! It was SO dumb. I could read posts in Reader, but I couldn’t comment — AND THEN when I just had to comment I would have to whip out my phone and spend even MORE time trying to type with my fat fingers. Yeah, that was productive
I pretty much love every post you write – you are so thoughtful and I can tell you really care about everything you write! It is nice to hear that even the bloggers you “admire” have the same thoughts — or had them at one point. Failure is just an opportunity to be better!
Thank you!! I’m so incredibly flattered.
I definitely struggle with this stuff still. And I always wonder if it ever stops. Like – once you make it big, do you just step back and stop comparing? I sometimes catch myself thinking this way but if I was really honest, I bet you never do. There’s always another level to reach – always someone else to compare yourself to (if you get caught up in it all, that is)
Lauren recently posted..The Real Reason I’m Not a Morning Runner
Most of the time I read blogs but I am on my phone and it is a pain in the you-know-what to try to comment.. I’m sure there are plenty of other “blog stalkers” out there like me, who are reading your posts but don’t comment. You have a great blog so please keep at it!
Michelle-
Like I’ve said before, I look forward to reading your posts every day, but I don’t comment much at all. Basically, I’m just a blog stalker. As much envy as you feel at times, there are loads of people that envy YOU!!!
I enjoy your heart!
I love reading about your family!
I envy some of the runs you post!
There would truly be a void in the blogging world without your FUNNY.INSPIRATIONAL.MOTIVATIONAL.SENTIMENTAL.ENVIOUS.THOUGHT-PROVOKING. posts!
Keep up the bloggitute!
Aww thank you so so much!! I keeping it up — and my hope is to become an even better writer