I wasn’t going to post today but then I couldn’t stop thinking this one thing. I really, really want to go for run. It’s actually taking a lot of effort for me to not go throw on some workout clothes, lace up my shoes, and go out for a run. Hell, I’m not even sure I could run right now. It certainly wouldn’t be pretty. It would probably be more like waddle shuffling. I’m NOT going to run, because I know my body would hate me (I mean, come on, it hates me when I roll over too fast) – but don’t be surprised to see me out there trying to induce labor next month. I’m not even joking.
Just this thought alone has confirmed that my fears are crazy.It’s kinda like when you see someone running in 95+ degree weather and you want to join them. Or when you torture yourself by reading a million race reviews and you wish you could have been there, despite how crappy the race went. Or when you see someone the pouring raining- and you want to join them. Or you see someone walking and you want to scream out the window at them, “WHY DON’T YOU RUN???” (am I the only one who feels this way?) – and then you want to join them. If you haven’t caught on… I really want to run.
Bottom line? I am a runner.
I AM A RUNNER because my runs have names. I do tempo runs and threshold runs and fartlek runs. I do long, slow runs and track workouts. My runs are defined, even if my abs are not.
I AM A RUNNER because my shoes are training equipment, not a fashion statement. The best shoe for me is the one that makes me a better runner. I choose the shoe that goes with my running mechanics, not my running outfit.
I AM A RUNNER because I don’t have running outfits. I have technical shirts and shorts and socks. I have apparel that enhances the experience of running by allowing me to run comfortably. I can say “Coolmax” and “Gore-Tex” in the same sentence and know which does what.
I AM A RUNNER because I know what effort feels like, and I embrace it. I know when I’m pushing the limits of my comfort and why I’m doing it. I know that heavy breathing and an accelerated heart rate–things I once avoided–are necessary if I want to be a better runner.
I AM A RUNNER because I value and respect my body. It will whisper to me when I’ve done too much. And if I choose to listen to that whisper, my body won’t have to scream in pain later on.
I AM A RUNNER because I am willing to lay it all on the line. I know that every finish line has the potential to lift my spirits to new highs or devastate me, yet I line up anyway.
I AM A RUNNER because I know that despite my best efforts, I will always want more from myself. I will always want to know my limits so that I can exceed them.
I AM A RUNNER because I run. Not because I run fast. Not because I run far.
I AM A RUNNER because I say I am. And no one can tell me I’m not.
Amen.
I am a bad influence here, but I TOTALLY ran when I was 40+ weeks to see if I could kickstart labor. It didn’t work, but I had a good laugh about how ridiculous I looked.
As you know, I had to take many months off before even getting pregnant. I can tell you now that the break has really revitalized my running. I am grateful for every single run – and you will be too.
Oh, and you’ll be more than ready for miracle miles. I’m running a 15k this weekend and I’ve done a couple ten milers and they’ve been fine.
Not a bad influence – just motivator!! I know a few people who have tried to bring on labor with running. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn’t — I say it’s worth a shot 🙂
I think I’m mostly concerned b/c I’ll be running again when it’s 900 degrees outside. I’m sad I’ve missed such a long spring! I have to remind myself that if I can do a race at 24 weeks pregnant, I can definitely run/walk 9 miles in September!
This is a perfect read for me right now! Here in Indiana we have had a few decent weather days lately when I see everyone out running it’s tough not to lace up and join them but I know the run in my head is WAY better than the running I would actually do at this point! I get a little “bouncy” on the treadmill, you know that fast walk where you just really want to run but know better? I did it. I ran, for all of 10 seconds a few days ago. Not pretty. Not comfortable. So I totally support your decision not run at this point but also get where you are coming from! We’ll be out there again soon!
We WILL be out there soon – and then we’ll be complaining about how hard it is! ha ha. I say go for the run – what can it hurt at this point??
Ah, I love the “I am a runner” part. I actually just had an “I am a runner” moment yesterday during my run. You will be running soon enough but for now I will run for you!
Isn’t it great? I love reading that because it’s SO true. And yes, I’ll be running soon enough!!
I totally know how you feel. I was sidelined from running for 3 1/2 wks & I went and walked a 5k. While i was there, some girl said she was running 15 miles that day & I caught myself saying out loud “Man, I wish I was able to run 15 miles right now. I miss long runs.”
I love that “I am a runner” part.
Isn’t it funny how absence makes the heart grow fonder??
I think I need to frame that I am a runner part – it’s so true!
I love this post. I can definitely relate at times. Also, one of my favorite running buddies is VERY pregnant, and after running 2 full marathons and a handful of halfs while pregnant, she is finally too big to run. I feel so bad for her, and I can imagine how irritating it can be not to run. I crave it myself. I hope you will be back to running in no time after your baby!
It’s hardest when the weather is perfect and see everyone else out there running! As much as I complain, I love being pregnant and wouldn’t give this up for the world – but sometimes a good run is the only thing that will clear your head!
Obviously I don’t know what it’s like to not be able to run because I’m carrying a child, but I do know how frustrating it is to want to run and not be able to. I remember giving (unintentional!) dirty looks to people running when I couldn’t. It’s the worst feeling ever. Hopefully you can still get some endorphins from spinning and strength training. Just think–when you can run again, it will feel SO good.
I think any reason that you can’t run is beyond frustrating! I know you feel me.
I do get little bit of an endorphin high from spin – but it’s definitely not the same (and it’s starting to get uncomfortable). I love this baby belly, but yes – when I can run again I will be thrilled!!
Love these quotes.
I can totally relate to this. I would daydream and even dream at night about running toward the end of my pregnancy and while I was waiting to start running again after I had the baby. I went for a short run 2 days before I went into labor so it might not hurt to give it a try when you’re closer to the end :).
I remember feeling for you at the end of your pregnancy! Seems weird that I’m now in your shoes 4 months later!!!
I am definitely going to go for a waddle/shuffle/run in a few weeks!!
You know I feel the same way! Also completely understand about your body hating you for rolling over too fast – mine feels the same way. 🙂